Why I wrote “Simply Mama Fearless”
Find out why I wrote “Simply Mama Fearless” and the passionate motivation behind it.
In some of my other articles I’ve written about how I closed all my pregnancy books. I wasn’t joking when I said it–I had a stack of pregnancy books on my nightstand when I got my happy news.
I didn’t completely read through a single one.
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What about the medical facts? Didn’t I want to know how my baby was progressing?
Of course! I downloaded a pregnancy app on my phone that gave me updates on what was going on with my baby as each day progressed. It also gave me some basic health tips. I looked through them carefully and pulled info from it as I felt I needed to.
Was I worried about eating something that would hurt my baby?
Well, to be honest… no. It’s not really rocket science… you’re growing another human being inside of you. It’s important to keep a healthy, nutritious diet and avoid foods that aren’t good for baby. They’re easy to spot because they’re mostly not good for you, either. We can all pinpoint those.
The other thing is this. If you’ve spent your life eating a certain way, suddenly changing your entire lifestyle isn’t going to magically grow a perfect baby. Yes, if you’ve eaten nothing but junk, you should stop immediately and give your body and your baby something more nutritious.
You’ve treated your body a certain way–good or bad–for a span of time. There will still be effects of that, even if you stop today. That’s no reason to give in and throw health to the wind, of course, but we should have realistic expectations on our body based on how we’ve lived.
I made lifestyle changes when I knew I wanted a baby in the future, and because I believe my body is a temple of God, I try to take care of it in general. That in no way means I’m perfect and stick to this incredible diet. It means that I do my best to have a balanced diet, stay reasonably active, and avoid the obvious habits that hurt my body and my mind. I didn’t obsess over magical foods that I needed for baby, or stressed about strange, harmful substances that would affect my pregnancy.
Why I Wrote “Simply Mama Fearless”
So, What Did I Do?
If I didn’t read pregnancy books, where did I get my information and education?
I downloaded a pregnancy app and kept tight control on what I read and I stayed in contact with my doctor who helped me understand the basic health concepts I needed to know. I gleaned advice from other, positive-minded mothers.
Mostly, I followed my instincts and I took responsibility for my pregnancy. I then placed my baby and myself in God’s hands through prayer and faith. Then, I closed my eyes, so to speak, and I learned how to go with my gut. I decided to trust that God-given ability to discern what was healthy for my baby. As my pregnancy progressed, so did my instinctive skills. By the time labor arrived, I felt confident and in tune with my body, which made all the difference for my natural hospital birth.
Now comes the million dollar question.
If I was so against reading pregnancy books, why did I write one?
From the moment I announced my pregnancy, I received enough advice to last years. I appreciated a lot of it. Some of it, however, was negative, some was superstitious, and some of it was downright morbid. It was exactly what I didn’t need during my pregnancy journey.
I experienced enough to quickly learn that the positive element is threatened at best, and completely missing at worst. I received more stories about pain, complications, miscarriages, disease, fear, old customs and tragedy than any pregnant woman should ever have to hear.
I endured remarks about my decisions regarding my method of birth, accusations against our healthcare system (which was my only affordable option aside from a home birth), and remarks about my image as I carried our little miracle.
That’s Not All
The books I began to read were chalk full of medical advice, tips, birth positioning, food, and all kinds of other information. A lot of them were written with a fear or suspicion-inducing perspective. Honestly, everything about my pregnancy was a miracle, a positive in my life, and I didn’t want to taint it with a negative flavor–no matter the advice.
I knew I could glean the same advice from just about anywhere, and control how much of it I needed based on where I was in my pregnancy. I was also very particular about the underlying motivations of every source. If someone was angry and casting blame on another party, I politely clicked out. I wasn’t going to wear someone else’s maternity shirt of blame.
What I would have loved was a book that just fiercely believed in me and backed me up, without trying to push me to use a specific method of birth.
That’s what Simply Mama Fearless is all about.
There’s a huge amount of pregnancy books to help you with just about everything you need, medically, naturally, emotionally, and just about everything else. But Simply Mama Fearless is dedicated to the “mama” part of us that begins at conception, to that place in us where our instincts come alive, birthed out of love and sacrifice for our baby.
What you WON’T find in Simply Mama Fearless
You won’t find a single bit of medical advice.
It’s not necessary, and I’m no doctor. You don’t need another book telling you what to do to be pregnant. As far as I’m concerned, you really don’t need anyone telling you how to be pregnant. You already, instinctively know that.
You won’t find pressure regarding a certain birth method.
While I write about my own birth experience, the focus isn’t on the method so much as my choice, and how I learned to stand by my instincts. I don’t believe in telling you how to give birth, only that you can and you can do it however you believe you should.
You won’t find recommendations on medications, foods or vitamins.
Again, there are plenty of resources for that. You don’t need another voice chiming in to tell you what to or not to eat or what to take.
Why I Wrote “Simply Mama Fearless” & What It’s All About
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So you’re pregnant–you just found out. You’ve gotten that positive home pregnancy test and you’re beyond excited. You take all the necessary steps to begin your journey.
Then comes the advice, the remarks, and the attack on your confidence.
You pick up the book and you raise your eyebrows. It’s rather short, but you’re exhausted and nauseated so that’s totally fine by you. It’s this lightweight book, 63 pages and the title is kinda different. But you like the idea of fearlessness, so you start reading.
That’s when you catch the tone of Simply Mama Fearless. You realize it’s not a book about medical advice, a week-by-week guide, or a fancy argument on why you should go natural or not. It’s literally one human who was just pregnant talking to another pregnant human. You realize it’s a real person who wanted to walk the middle of the road and just be pregnant.
She Believes In You
As you read, you find that this human starts talking to you like you’re intelligent, like you’re capable, and like you deserve to be confident. That strange little tension between your shoulder blades eases up a bit, because you like the idea of support without a perspective of negativity, fear or suspicion. And you like feeling like you aren’t making a wrong choice.
Times goes by, and before you know it, you’re already a majority of the way through the book. You smile, because you can relate with what this human is going through, and you appreciate feeling like someone is fighting for you. It’s encouraging and emboldening
You get to the end and you close the cover, and you feel like, “I can actually do this. All by myself.”
And that’s why I wrote Simply Mama Fearless, that short little book that is determined to help you fight off your fears and just be stinking pregnant.