In this article, we’ll discuss Things That Cause Fear During Pregnancy: Unexpected Change and examine how we can deal with it in a healthy way.
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Things That Cause Fear During Pregnancy: Unexpected Change
It’s crucial that we have it, and once we have, that we keep it. Yep, control. So when something new happens–either an event during pregnancy or pregnancy itself–that we weren’t planning or expecting, it throws us into a tailspin.
We are instantly scrambling, fighting to regain our sense of control.
The truth about pregnancy is that there is a lot we just simply cannot control. Period. Stuff happens. We want black and white.
Pregnancy is all about doing the happy dance in the gray zone. Nothing is ever guaranteed… well, except for gaining weight!
I’ll never forget the instant panic I felt when I took the pregnancy test for my second baby (which I had no idea was on its way) and saw that dark positive line.
I can’t even give you a solid reason why I decided to take that test, except to rule out pregnancy so I could continue on trying to figure out why I felt so… off. But that panicky feeling was all about control.
My Type-A started screeching in nanoseconds.
If I’d let it, that panic would have escalated into fear. I’ve waged war against fear since the start of my first pregnancy journey, and I’m not about to lose.
So, it was time to get it together. My sense of control floundered and I had to figure out how to deal.
I found my greatest sense of peace by just letting it go.
So, this was an unexpected surprise, a really big change, but it’s all good. I was determined to roll with it.
That gave me back the power, and the excitement and all the lovey dovey emotions to go with a new pregnancy. Muuuuch better!
Woo! This one can cause some serious fear! Pregnancy is such a gray zone it isn’t even funny. Sometimes little things pop up that we totally didn’t see coming.
It can range from things like twins all the way to health complications. Things can get sticky. Now we really don’t feel in control–and we’re afraid.
I wasn’t expecting debilitating back pain with my first baby. I wasn’t expecting to have to fight with a sketchy GD diagnosis, and I know several beautiful mamas who didn’t foresee preeclampsia or other complications.
But it happened.
So now what? It’s stinking scary to be told that stuff! Hey, Mama, I feel your pain. I understand your fears.
Here’s the deal–we can either let these unforeseen challenges take over, or we can decide to roll with it and do our very best. Giving in to the fear won’t help the situation, and can in fact make it worse.
It doesn’t have to be that way.
Remember, some fear and apprehension is totally normal! But, that debilitating anxiety that threatens your sense of peace and well-being, that crawls into your head and messes with you–that is not okay!
That’s where we need to draw the line. We’ve got to fight that off for our sake and for the sake of our babies. And we can!
Drastic Changes to Our Plans
I had to battle this with Baby J2. This one was a total surprise. It was crazy. After the initial panic, I then had to fight off a sense of insecurity that settled over me like a dark cloud.
I wasn’t expecting this so soon. Was I ready? Was I capable of being a mom of 2 under 2? Could my body handle a second pregnancy so soon?
I struggled with feelings of doubt, inadequacy, worry, even some anxiety. It wasn’t cool. I found myself quoting back all those smart little sayings I’d written in Simply Mama Fearless. It was time to practice what I wrote, time to walk the walk.
Could I really do it, though? Well, yeah. Actually, I could. Because I wasn’t willing to give in to those emotions. The questions still come over me at times, because I am a severe control freak. But I refuse to give up. I can’t keep the thoughts from coming, but I can respond to them. I can fight back.
Am I capable of being a mom of two so much sooner than I planned? Yes! Know why? Because that’s what’s going to happen and I’m going to give it my best.
Is my body capable of handling this pregnancy? Yes! This what my body was made to do, and I’ll make choices that make it easier (so far, my body has handled this pregnancy wonderfully, thank the Lord! He knows what He’s doing!).
Was I ready? Maybe not, but I’m certainly getting ready now!
Hey, I’m learning to be okay with not having it all perfectly together. Who said it had to be perfect, anyway? I love my family, and that’s what matters.
What To Do About Unexpected Changes?
It can be so, so hard to adapt to stuff we just didn’t see coming. But there’s something you need to remember. You are an amazing human. You have capabilities and strengths beyond what you even realize.
And guess what brings that out? Challenges. That’s when you see how incredible you really are.
I can’t pretend to fully understand every possible challenge or change out there, but I can relate to the heart of the mama that refuses to quit. You are made of tough stuff.
So climb that mountain, and keep on climbing. Face those challenges. When the going gets tough, rub that belly and just love on that little. Connecting with that baby inside of you will give you that sense of determination you need to fight on.
Do it for love.
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear…1 John 4:18
Let your love grow stronger than your need for control, stronger than your worries and questions, and stronger than the challenges you face. Let your sense of love take over, and rock that pregnancy, whatever it brings.
You can do it, Fearless Mama!
Thank you for reading Things That Cause Fear During Pregnancy: Unexpected Change. I hope you feel encouraged to carry on through all the challenges that you may face!
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